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Do you have any small islands in rivers that you know? Please comment on my poem - thanks?
Lynch Island - Eve of Spring
(we were moored close to this, so I had a fantastic view. I've modified it slightly, but it's not one you have seen before) Lynch Island is in the Thames
The sun sets on river cold,
Spreading its net of finest gold.
Meandering, glistening bright
Glorious scene, in half baked light
Island silent, branches bare
No sign of springtime stirring there
Bereft of leaf, limbs resting arched
Sedate, weary, last days of March
Here trunks of tree have fitted coats
Which creep and crawl to open throats
Where ivy's splash of colour seen
Conceals old bark, dark shades of green
Sky beckons on dim, dusky night
Web wings appear in echoed flight
From roosts high, in their boxes fixed
Twixt skeletal arms, crossed and mixed
Swift, swollen flow slaps unsafe bank
Crushed reeds lie broken, sodden dank
Flotilla debris sails past free
On downstream swim to open sea
Thank you so much! I almost didn't read this because most amateur (and a lot of professional) poetry is so bad any more, with literally no rhyme nor reason (or rhythm, or even a discernable point). I am glad that there are still people who understand and appreciate real poetry.
Your poem is beautiful, almost haunting toward the end. I almost expected it to end without a real conclusion, simply a description of one's surroundings, But I was pleasently surprised. I think the "floatilla debris" sailing "to open sea" provides closure, as it drifts out of your sight on its final journey.
I also thought the allusion to the debris "flotilla" (good word!) "SAILING" away in the context of your own "sailing" was, perhaps unintentionally, charming. We the readers, however, only know that you yourself were sailing because of your text introduction. It is your work, and it is brilliant as it stands, but I might suggest that you consider an opening quatrain explaining that you are observing this as you tranquilly meditate and reflect upon the scene before you (using your own words, of course; and I say "tranquilly" only because I think it is the emotion you intend to emote).
Very beautiful in many ways. Thank you for sharing it.
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